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Showing posts with label parenting. Show all posts
Showing posts with label parenting. Show all posts

Wednesday, March 3, 2010

letting go


I love my daughters. I always wanted to be a mom but never realized the love that a heart can hold for two little people. (There is room for more too, if it is God's will) My heart is so full and content and blessed. Out of the myriad of jobs I have worked, before, during, and after college, being a mom is the first one that feels like just the right fit.

Who knows where and when the desire to be a parent began for me. Working with the kindergartners when I was in sixth grade? Babysitting in high school? Working as a nanny while in college? Meeting my beautiful nephews and niece? All of these experiences were fuel for making me the mom I am today. Sometimes, I am a good, patient, creative mom. Some days, I am a yelling, short-tempered, not-so-nice mom. On these days, I am embarrassed and feel guilty about not having patience. Thankfully, they are fewer than the good days (or at least I tell myself).

Slowly, I am starting to realize that in order to be the "good" mom more days than not......I need to step away and be hands off once in awhile. This I am not good at. Even when Daddy is home, I tend to step in and do everything and always be hands on. I guess I am a little OC about our children. This said, Dan and I are getting away for a week which causes much anxiety and worry for me. I know the girls we be loved and well cared for with their grandparents. It is just the fact that it won't be me. Any advice on how to handle this, relax, and enjoy our vacation will be greatly appreciated.